Man, I don't know what to say. Work sucks. I feel like I've made a terrible mistake.

I went back into what I'd easily call the "tried and true" route to employment, which is basically just taking an awful retail job and just trying to make it work despite being paid almost literal pennies to stay alive. It keeps the lights on, but it makes me feel like I'm dying. At this point it's almost literal, because I almost didn't make it through my last shift.

I can't even categorize an emotion for this post; so I'll just leave it blank. It's kind of like realizing how much time you've been wasting and for how long. I've tried the flying solo thing but I lack the confidence to use anything I've learned to make any real money. You don't realize how hard things like that are until you actually try.

Progress on pretty much all of my creative projects has halted, including some stuff I was relatively excited about. There's just no time or energy. My job robbed me of that; and it's still robbing me. It's still basically killing me.

I've started to reach out to some people that might be able to help me figure out what it is I really want to do with my life. Because right now? This ain't it chief, I feel like a shell of my former self.